Sunday, July 27, 2008

So You Think I'm a Tease?

Dear Asshat-

Just because we've exchanged a couple of emails and IM's does not ensure that 1) I'm willing to go out with you and 2) does not mean I've led you on.

I'm only willing to waste my time sparingly and given that I don't have a whole lot of time to waste, I decided not to give you any of it for the following reasons:
  1. Your lack of knowledge as to the difference between a Pinot Gris and a Pinot Noir (one is white and the other red, asshat). Snobby? Sure. But, hey, I look for that type of knowledge in the men I date.
  2. Having a boat is not an automatic turn on for me. Asking me on a first date on said boat only brought visions of me stuck in the middle of the Potomac having to swim back to shore to avoid your roaming hands. And by the way, telling me that sailboats are for those who want to work made me question why you were so lazy. Sailboats? Way sexier than powerboats.
  3. Labeling other women you may have dated in the past as golddiggers only makes me think you have poor taste in women.
  4. Calling me a tease just because I had to sign off to go to a meeting and then emailing me to tell me the same only insured that my already sinking opinion of you has doomed you to the discard pile.

Listen, I'm a busy, busy girl. I don't need a man to complete me. I'm already complete. I know who I am and what I want. I'm successful at my career and I'm damn good at it. I make no apologies for it and I ask that the men I date try to work with my insane schedule.

In return, you get a great girlfriend. One who's witty, challenging, attractive and kind. One who you'd be proud to introduce to your parents, boss, colleagues and friends. One, who I might add, is great - nay, fantastic - in bed.

Too bad for you that I'm not interested. I've blocked your emails and your IM's so don't bother trying to contact me.



Blogger Capitol Hill 20210 said...

Totally feel you on this sucks.

When conversing with these idiots do you ever have them calling you sexy and stuff and have never even met you yet? I find that beyond creepy.

Monday, July 28, 2008 11:57:00 AM  
Blogger Gilahi said...

Knowing the difference between a pinot gris and a pinot noir is not snobby. That's just basic knowledge if one knows anything at all about wine. It's like knowing the difference between a beer and an ale for suds fanciers.

Monday, July 28, 2008 1:11:00 PM  
Blogger JoJo said...

Cap Hill - That was another charming (not!) attribute of the jerk. I remember, oh years ago, when dating used to be fun. Or is that viewing the past through rose colored glasses?

gilahi - I totally agree.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008 3:10:00 AM  

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